victims vs survivors/sorry long
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Posted by catballou
(4.14.160.44) on May 22, 2004 at 16:59:43:
ok, my opinion only. i was thinkin on the post below calling people victims. i want to define this in my own terms. i am a survivor. i look around here and i see survivors. do you know why? because victims wouldnt be posting. asking for help. becoming educated. victims may have the same circumstances we all have. they choose to do nothing. to not fight in court (even if we lose)..to not learn their rights..to not stand up for them. at times life throws us all curves. most, if not all of you here, have found those thrown at you. fair? no. life is a curve. what we do with it makes us who are. money? rich can be victims. debts? same. victim is another CA/abuser word..designed to judge. to belittle. to create in us a smaller person who wont fight back. now, im not saying we win all the time. some may have judgements. but right now, winning isnt what it appears. as long as one keeps trying, one is not a victim or a loser. victims feel helpless..and cant see that they arent. how to see it? educate yourself and ask. keep TRYING. survivors may feel helpless also, but they try to learn and stay unbowed. they make it. with their heads high. they know life curves are not who they are inside. its not the feelings..its what you do with them. yes, im scared. most of the time with these bills and other things. . we all are. but they arent who i am, nor who i will be. its ok to be scared of court, of being in debt, fear doesnt make you a victim. courage is being so scared you need a depends and still standing there. head high. courage is saying..i messed up..life threw me a curve, but im not gonna lay down and die. im not gonna quit. i dont have much, god knows. not money-wise. but i can keep learning the laws..my rights, and help someone else. even if no more than to support and hugs and caring. labels or circumstances dont make us victims. only we can make ourselves victims by quitting. its ok to ask questions, to rant sometimes, to cry sometimes. that doesnt make a victim. who is anyone they to label me? and during the hard days, ask for support and then get back up and keep goin. the most important things you can have cant be bought. and i been where we begged food at food banks. horrible feeling. and i am still a survivor. you all are SURVIVORS. its your choice to keep goin and fighting injustice and abuse. its your choice to give up..see yourself thru others eyes, and quit, also. i hope no one chooses that. but, we , people, are survivors. im glad to found this board, im glad to know everyone here, and i appreciate all everyone does for me. hold your heads high! we will make it. :)
ok, off soap box. next??? lol.
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